Sunday, February 28, 2010

Idle thoughts....

It has been a very boring few days, the only highlight being arrival of monthly paycheck. Finding that I was paid almost entirely in our wonderful new currency notes only added to the - ahem - joy. Of course, boredom is purely beacuse the preceding few days were full of excitement, traveling etc. etc.

Still the idle mind is the workshop of the devil and so on... and I've found myself repeatedly wondering (in an idle and non specific way of course) about having an affair.

Of course, the whole romance, excitement and attention of said affair would be offset by distraction during crucial parts of work, mismanagement of finances, and general disapproval of society.

Not to mention Darling dumping my sorry ass...

But I still can't help wondering....

So tell me, gentle readers... what do you consider as "cheating"? How do you define it?

26 comments:

PseudoRandom said...

There was a poll in Glamour magazine a while back...they asked men and women which was worse -
a) your partner cheating on you physically (i.e. it's just sex)
b) your partner cheating on you emotionally (i.e. they actually love the person they're cheating on you with)
More of the men chose (a) and more of the women chose (b)
...so I guess men and women define cheating differently.

It's natural to be attracted to other people, but entertaining the attraction and actually doing something about it is what I'd call cheating.

Dili/දිලින said...

All i saw in that was "Not to mention Darling dumping my sorry ass..." and I was like WTFH :S

All im gonna say I would be utterly heartbroken if anything miserable happened to you guys =/

Chavie said...

Echo Dili! :S

What PR said is also really true isn't it? I mean, more guys tend to see 'relationships' in the physical sense, and more women tend to see it in the emotional sense, so cheating would be that...

magerata said...

Even though I am yet to have any meaningful relationship, I think it would be better hang on to what is is hanging! :) You will "cheat" once, you will suffer wondering when will he find out!
Answering your question,window shopping is not cheating but trying on! how could you?

Serendib_Isle said...

Ditto to all of the above.
Cheating? You? Angel? Naah. These words don't fit well. ;)

Lady divine said...

Looks like Chavie beat me to what I wanted to say.. but just to add to it, it could be the other way around too...

Lady divine said...

also you will know you're cheating..when you start to feel guilty.:)

Azrael said...

Looking is ok I guess, but acting out on it is a big no no :)

pissu perera said...

mey mokada meh?

Jack Point said...

Hmm hmm, looks like the Devil is stalking Angel.

Thinking about an affair is not cheating.

Anonymous said...

Well.. That is entirely depend on the way how you feel it...

I mean in the existing relationship lack of some areas, (love mostly) and you tried your best to gain that and failed, you have a divine right to seek it elsewhere no matter what.

After all it's all your happiness that matters isn't it?

Anonymous said...

Angel, quite flabbergasted to hear the story!!!

Really???

santhoshi said...

I will have to just put ditto to what serendib said!

Angel said...

Thanks everyone for commenting...

PR, Chavie, Magerata, Azreal : Of course you are right... and about more things than one. But especially when we consider the emotional side of things, what exactly is "doing something"? Where do you cross the line from "window shopping" to "trying on"? Where is the line drawn?

Dili : you are so very sweet

Serendib, Santhoshi : awww... your faith in me is touching...

LD : yes, but that's the whole point... going into it with eyes open from day one...

PP : aney manda...

JP : yeah men... not nice that, having the devil on my heels

Annon 1 : thank you for voicing that... I dunno about a divine right, but I also object to being unhappy. that said, it also seems very selfish to think only of one's own happiness...

Annon 2 : Really

Heshantha : Thanks for your comment which I am not publishing as requested by you. I understand what you went through, more than you think, perhaps. I hope the course of action you took made you happy.

Gehan said...

instead of defining "cheating", perhaps it's best for you to first define what is "marriage"..

my idea of marriage is apparently too rigid and legalistic, by some standards, so i dont think i should preach, especially if u have a completely different view of it..

either way, u probabaly took a vow or made promise that you would be faithful to ur husband.. or something along those lines, depending on ur faith/culture/postal code... if boredom is enough of a reason to break that, then.. i dunno..

here's hoping the thought process ends here.. i wish you both well..

Kulendra Janaka said...

erm?

Angel said...

Gehan : yes, the vow/promise/whatever was also based on a lot of other promises, understandings etc. When those foundations begin to crumble, how can a mere promise hold up on its own?

Janaka : I will thank you to keep your thoughts to your self... Ok malli?

cj said...

Well some religious people say that if you think about it then it is as bad as doing it so I say everyone is definitely going to be think about getting it off with someone else other than their spouse which means you might as well get the real thing... on the other hand you could have an affair with your husband??? :)

dlb said...

Is there a vacancy??? lol...

Gehan said...

i dont think marriage is a legal contract of sorts, is it? u promise this and ill promise to do this? at least i hope it isnt... :S

sorry, i dont mean to be condescending or anything.. my earlier comment might come across that way and i apologise.. i just disagree with u, thats all :)

again, i hope u two work things out.. cheating is not an option under any circumstance...

Kulendra Janaka said...

hmm

Knatolee said...

I have been thinking about an answer to this since you first posted your question a couple of weeks back!

I don't think cheating is necessarily just a physical thing. Maybe it's just when you start looking outside the marriage (or relationship, if you're not married) for something that you should be finding INSIDE the marriage.

In the end, I think it's bound to be a painful way of dealing with problems within a relationship, and it would be better in the long run to face them head-on, but that's just my opinion! But I think if one is even starting to wonder about affairs and such, it's probably a sign that something is amiss in the marriage, something is lacking. It would be worth figuring out if what's missing can be retrieved, before throwing in the towel.

Did that make any sense at all? :)

woof.. woof... said...

No post for 16 days..... Hope thing aren't that bad....

Angel said...

CJ : thanks for the idea!

dlb : is that a proposition??

Gehan : well, it is a partnership of sorts, where "give" and "take" should be at equilibrium (they can nevr be equal, I think). No, you're not being condescending... and you are entitled to your opinion... thanks for the response.

Janaka : *raised eyebrow

Knatolee : thank you for the words of wisdom...

Woof : I am touched by your concern...

woof.. woof... said...

How couldn't I? after reading all the posts, seems that you are close to as my sister.

Thank you very much for sharing your thoughts, to make this world a better place, one step at a time.

Be positive always!!!

Anonymous said...

THOU SHALL NOT CHEAT!!!